Families: The Reason Why We Never Really ‘Grow Up’

When I was a little girl, I thought that grown ups were these mature people that always had the answers and wore sensible clothes. I thought that growing up was just another milestone similar to high school graduation. Now that I am of the age of someone who could be considered ‘grown up’ I am still wondering when my time will come to actually feel this way.

I’ve come to realize that there are a number of reasons why we never really feel grown up, but the main reason is because of our families. Love’em or hate’em, families have the strange ability to turn back time and make you feel like a kid again. That time you wet the bed when you had a sleep-over? Your cousin will never let you forget it. That embarrassing baby picture of you with poopy pants? It’s on display and framed for everyone’s viewing pleasure.

The thing about families is that just because we’ve grown up and moved away, it doesn’t mean that we’ll ever grow out of our childhood roles. It never fails, but whenever we have a family dinner, my mom will assume her maternal role and make sure we all have enough leftovers to last at least 10 days. My brother and I— like the little children we are—will gladly accept the handouts. When my dad tells a silly joke, I will roll my eyes like a teenager. And whenever my parents go away on vacation, they will always ask the older, more responsible sibling (my brother) to look after their house which is just fine by me, the young’un.

We can’t help it if we slip back decades each time we get together with our families. Although time passes and some things change, the family dynamic remains the same. For many people this is one of the reasons why they can’t stand their families. Childhood scars, issues, and insecurities have the tendency to pop up when we’re around those very people that may have been the cause of those very things.

But with the introduction of new family members such as spouses and children, the family dynamic changes again. My once quiet family is now a whole lot chattier now that my husband, the conversationalist came on the scene. And thanks to my daughter, I’m technically not the baby in the family anymore.

No matter how much our families may frustrate or annoy us, they are our link to the past. It’s somewhat comforting that this odd ensemble of relatives has seen you through your cute baby stage, to your gawky pubescent phase, and to see you finally stumble, fall, and hopefully pick yourself up as you’ve ‘grown up.’ Now that I am a mother, it’s nice to go to my parent’s home to be a kid again (for a few hours anyway).

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